wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
be right there i have to get my cape
so much tequila, so little girl.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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