when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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