But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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