ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize