sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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