I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
