i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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