just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
