wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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