This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I just want nice things and good sex
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
