East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
