Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
