he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize