We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
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