she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
