i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
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