I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
