thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
