wat bout pragnant strippers??
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Randomize
