So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize