when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Randomize
