I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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