We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Me. At least after what I've been through.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Randomize
