I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
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