So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
