This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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