even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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