I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
