I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
