He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
