question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
