yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
