I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
