I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
