Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
