Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
