i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
