So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize
