this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
