He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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