Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Let's get the cat blown out
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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