I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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