I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
