Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
