vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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