I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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