I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
