I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
