with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Randomize
