i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
