I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
