Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
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